Aloha Dear Ones,

It’s very early in the morning on Maui.  The need for rest and reflection has been foremost since Christmas Eve.

I’ve been a Unity Church chaplain for almost 10 years.  About a week before Unity’s Christmas Eve service,  I was asked to give the opening prayer.  I immediately said yes, then the scope of the responsibility set in. I wondered if I could show up the way that was needed, if I could be available to that deep edge of my being that allows the Holy Spirit/evolutionary impulse to come forth.  I didn’t want my own personality conditioning, or my human mind, to write and deliver a prayer that would just sound good–I wanted a truer voice to speak.

Unity Church on Maui (unityonmaui.org) started having the chaplains give opening prayers for Sunday services about six months ago.  We tend to follow a format for affirmative prayer used by many, “new thought,” groups, such as Religious Science.  This form of affirmative prayer, sometimes called, “five-step prayer,” focuses on acknowledging divine presence, aligning with this holy presence, affirming one’s intention, giving thanks and releasing the prayer to divine outcome.

For the past few months, my prayers have increasingly included evolutionary language and concepts.  I find myself saying things like, “Beloved Presence, we know that there is not only this now moment–there is also this now moment, becoming–we lean forward, together, into the edge of that becoming, into the space between us, for in the space between us, there is an awareness emerging of our essential unity, of a deeper, higher love that is our true nature, a sacred reality that is so much more powerful than any challenge we might face on our own, that is becoming stronger each day.”

I pray with my eyes open, looking into the eyes of people around the room.  When my prayers at Unity became more evolutionary, some people whose heads were bowed began to look up at me, with an expression both surprised and curious.  As I continued to pray, I saw people’s faces soften, open, then seem to brighten, with a quality of hope.  I especially noticed that when words of, “leaning together into the space between us, where we are more available to consciousness emerging, where there is a love and wisdom awakening between us that is so much stronger than any trial we face alone,” that some people sat straighter, some began gently crying, all appearing to release isolation, to embrace connection.

Together, with my brothers and sisters, I felt the sweet comfort of being one heart , and with that experience of unity, a deeper motivation to do the right thing–for God, for myself, for these people who are part of me, and who, with me, are all part of God.

Each time this happened, I was left with a feeling of amazement.  I would come with a frame for the occasion on any given Sunday, but never write a prayer, always allowing it to unfold in the moment.  I grew to trust that a greater presence would show up, in this new, exciting way, and felt a precious alignment with our small congregation.

On Christmas Eve, attendance is always much larger.  Unity moves its service to the Iao Theater in Wailuku town, which seats about 500.  A wide range of people come, mainland visitors from traditional churches, new age Mauians on a variety of paths, and locals.  I felt some trepidation about giving the opening prayer with this bigger group, with such different beliefs and expectations.  The concern was about my egoic conditioning. Could my personality self get out of the way enough to express as the evolutionary impulse?  Or would the false self feel compelled to put on a show on this bigger stage?

My ego wasn’t my only concern.  There was a call on my heart to truly honor Jesus as the birth of God’s love in form, as God’s love made manifest for humanity.

Unity was founded by a passionately Christian couple, Charles and Myrtle Fillmore.  Their intention was to explore Christ consciousness under a big umbrella, accepting that all paths lead to God, welcoming people of all faiths to come together to study and celebrate a greater truth of being and living. My experience in Unity was that while every effort was made to acknowledge the beauty of all paths, there was at times a reluctance to speak of its Christian roots.  There was a sensitivity to the number of, “recovering fundamentalists,” in the Unity movement, those who had been wounded in conservative Christian churches where they experienced condemnation, and who could be offended by the mere mention of Jesus’ name.

I get this–and, there is an expanding awareness that allows us to heal, to hear with the ear of the heart.  My former Unity minister, Rev. Mary Omwake, told me about a conversation she had with Rev. Michael Beckwith, of Apage, in Los Angeles.  He said, “Maybe we are healed enough now to start talking about Jesus again.”  Amen.

So, how do I honor Jesus on the night we celebrate his birthday, on a Unity platform, being available as the evolutionary impulse, without my ego staging the gig?  What would you do?

This post is becoming so very long–I need a little food and a walk along Ma’alaea Bay.  Can I tell you tomorrow what happened?  Thank you, Beloved.

Love and blessings,

Dr. Julianne

 

 

Aloha Dear Ones,

It’s Christmas Eve, the most sacred night of the year for the Christian community.

If you’ve read my last couple posts introducing evolutionary spirituality and evolutionary relationship, you might be wondering, “What does Jesus have to do with it?”  For me, coming from a conservative Lutheran home, Jesus Christ is an essential part of the divine mystery.

Exactly what part of the mystery Jesus plays has been a central question of my spiritual journey.  As a child, there wasn’t a question about the role of Christ on Sunday mornings. Nor was there any question of Jesus’ role in our home on a daily basis, as my devout mother reminded the family to show the love and forgiveness demonstrated by our savior.

I remember my first questionings of the fundamentalist interpretation of Bible scripture.  It was one of the Sundays our small mid-western church had a visiting missionary.   As he earnestly shared stories of victoriously converting the poor heathens, thereby saving them from eternal damnation in the fires of hell, I experienced an unfamiliar sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.  I had heard these stories before, but somehow, on that morning, there was a malaise that gripped me, an awareness that was encroaching upon six years of the best-intentioned conditioning (yes, I was only six).

I accepted that God so loved the world that He sent Jesus to show us how to love each other. My parents tried to follow Christ’s example, and they were very loving towards my brother and me, and to our neighbors.  God must be happy with them, and me, I assured myself. Maybe God would be happier with people from other countries if they followed Jesus, too–but would God, who loved us so much, really send them to hell forever if they didn’t?

I just couldn’t buy it anymore.  The veil of separation from those who had appeared to be different from me was in place for six years, and then simply had to lift.  I remember sitting in the pew, watching the missionary’s face increasingly flush as he admonished us about the torments of hell waiting for the unconfessed, and thinking to myself, “he’s trying to be good, he just doesn’t understand that God and Jesus love everybody, no matter where people live or what kind of church their parents go to.”

So, there you have it.  I cannot pretend differently, my dear friends who subscribe to the orthodox doctrine of the exclusivity of Christ Jesus.  The condemnation of those from other religious traditions that I could not stomach as an innocent child, I cannot accept now.

Yet, my relationship with Jesus continues, grows in depth and breadth.  My capacity to understand and appreciate the miracle of his birth, his living example of  divine love in human form, his sacrifice, his promise, increases as I experience my own heartbreaks and joys along life’s path.  I identify as a Christian.  I often find myself in between cultural/ spiritual groups, not enough Jesus for some, too much for others.

During the first year of my immersion in the Evolutionary Life Transformation Program (ELTP), an online, global, evolutionary spirituality community created by Craig Hamilton (IntegralEnlightenment.com), I helped create a small, “Interest/Learning Group,” for Christians within the larger group of students. Together, we explored our relationship with Christ, and the impact of the evolutionary perspective on our personal experience of Jesus.  All of us were passionate about embracing the evolutionary impulse urging us to expanded our identity as, “We,” aligned with sacred deep care, God, and becoming responsible for living as that.  All of us discovered an even deeper, realer connection with Christ throughout this process of inquiry.

What does Jesus have to do with evolutionary/integral spirituality?  He is the best evidence of it I have found.  How, exactly, it all works, I don’t pretend to know.  I only know that on the eve of his birth, my heart rejoices.  I believe that Christ is God’s love made manifest.  My life is more aligned with his teachings now, than ever.  Even though I tremble with the enormity of that not yet known, I can tenderly, fiercely, look into the eyes of my little six-year-old self and say, “You were onto something, sweetie–keep asking, keep finding.”

Happy Christmas Eve.

Love and blessings,

Dr. Julianne

Aloha Dear Ones,

Tonight I’d like to begin sharing with you the essential dynamics of evolutionary relationship, as I have come to understand them.

For the past two years, I have been immersed in the study of evolutionary spirituality with Craig Hamilton, a teacher based in Northern California. Craig’s site is IntegralEnlightenment.com.  He studied for many years with the best-known proponent of evolutionary spirituality, Andrew Cohen. Andrew’s new book, “Evolutionary Enlightenment,” available on Amazon, is a great resource for those seeking to understand the evolutionary perspective.

One of the most fascinating and hopeful discoveries of evolutionary community has been the emergence of a, “We space.”  This, “We,” is an experience of mutual inner knowing between people that seems to be beyond personality conditioning, a visceral awareness of something that was previously a spiritual metaphor of unity, of us being, “all God’s children.”  There are updated metaphors referring to humanity as, “one life, ” or, “one heartbeat.”

Evolutionaries speak of the, “evolutionary impulse,” or the active face of God, the forward-moving divine intention that Mother Teresa called upon us to embody, because, “God has no hands but ours.”   My background is Christian, and my purest experience of what my ministers would call, “The Holy Spirit,” is how I experience the evolutionary impulse. For me, there is no difference in the spiritual power to which these terms seek to give expression. There is the same ever-present mystery, the quality of deep care, a sacred fire urging us to recognize each other as brothers and sisters, holding us responsible for doing the right thing, motivating us to act for the higher good, in the name of love.

Craig Hamilton has written, “Principles of Evolutionary Culture: How you can create a microcosm of Heaven on Earth.”  These 10 principles, written with inspiring clarity, offer practices relating to each other as the We beyond individual egoic conditioning, responsive to the evolutionary impulse’s call to a more passionately conscious, sacred life, to more powerfully creative, loving, mutual relationships.  The principles were intended to facilitate groups–I will paraphrase the principles as a framework for relationship.  Visit IntegralEnlightment.com to view Craig Hamilton’s original, “Principles of Evolutionary Culture.”

The first of the 10 principles is, “A Wholehearted Intention to Transform.”

Bring all of yourselves to this relationship.  Recognize that this is a place where your own deepest longing for a greater life, a holy life, can be engaged and expressed.  Have the love, trust, and courage to give your heart and soul to the way you will be learning to relate with each other, and with all others.  Do this in the knowledge that the single most transformative power in the world is the power of our intention.  If you want your life to change in a profound way, it will.  If you want your relationship to change for the greater good, it will.  With that kind of intention behind you, your relationship  can be a powerful catalyst for waking up together, for experiencing a deeper, higher love that will inspire the world.

Wow.  What a pure, powerful, righteous intention.  I feel my heart bursting open with hope for something better than I’ve ever known before when I read those words.   What would happen if you committed to relating to your partner in this light?  How would your life be different if you related to everyone with such a sacred intention?

Something to think about, to feel into, to let in.  Just receive this as a gift. Consider embarking on an amazing adventure towards the real thing, together.

Love and blessings,

Dr. Julianne

 

 

Aloha Everyone,

I want to begin tonight by telling all of you how much I appreciate you.  Each person who opens their mind and heart to creating more happy, loving relationships is an inspiration to me, and a blessing to humanity.

Today I met with a new client.  His courage, and his willingness to embrace change, to explore possibilities for  authentic relationship, just blows me away.  I have a certain expectation of those who have been studying conscious connection, that they will at least try to improve the quality of their friendships and intimate relationships.  But when someone whose life has been focused on business/corporate realms shows up with brilliant openness to interpersonal transformation, I am truly amazed and grateful.

Let’s talk about the question from a local couple asking for suggestions on how to use some of the Christmas spirit to strengthen their marriage.  O.K., the wife asked the question, but she did say that if she’s smart about picking a time (not when the husband is hungry, or watching the big game), her guy is actually interested in doing things that bring them closer emotionally and physically.  It doesn’t hurt to remind the man that one often leads to the other.

I heard a wonderful suggestion for deepening and enlivening the relationship between couples who have been together for awhile from Patricia Albere, who founded EvolutionaryCollective.com.  (Patricia is offering a 5-week on-line course on Evolutionary Relationship the beginning of January, for a very reasonable cost.  She is a pioneer on the cutting edge of evolving mutuality in relationships.  I strongly recommend going to EvolutionaryCollective.com and checking out this opportunity.)

The suggestion for couples seeking more genuine mutuality in their partnership, is to each write down a list of what they are passionate about, and what they would like to have more of in their lives.  Then they both share their lists.  Together, they make a new list, ranking all their passions in order of how important each one is for the happiness of their marriage.

Keep in mind that a healthy marriage has a wide range of needs, from spiritual depth and alignment of life purpose, to emotional connection and sexual satisfaction, to just plain, G-rated fun.  Really, make sure having fun makes it into the top five.

When the couple has their list ranking passions most important to their marriage, they carefully look at each one, exploring it’s role in their relationship.  Where is the passion working to bring them closer?  Where is it creating uncomfortable distance?  Be honest with your mate.  The fastest, most effective way to change is to accept the truth about how things are now.

Explore how each passion might be enjoyed in a way that is most rewarding for both partners.  Just throw out ideas, don’t worry about getting it right.  See yourselves on an adventure of discovery, with the good and noble purpose of more ease, understanding and pleasure between you. Ask who is more able to change/enhance how each passion is enjoyed/experienced.  Agree to be teachers/coaches for each other, “I’ll show you how to have a better time with this, if you’ll help me appreciate that.”

Again, explore with the spirit of adventure.  This isn’t about duty, about obeying external rules and meeting standard expectations.  This is about the two of you, those two people who met and liked each other a whole lot, that couple who had such a good time together, they decided to hook-up every day.

The heart can open at Christmas in a very tender way.  We celebrate the birth of Divine Love in human form.  Surely the new possibility of conscious love that Christ embodied can help couples become more conscious about sharing the passions that bring their love alive.

Love and blessings,

Dr. Julianne

Aloha from Maui, Hawaii!

 

Aloha Everyone,

This week has been full of questions about looking for love, keeping love, knowing when love has gone, saying goodbye to a love and preparing to love again.

I’m tempted to write two separate posts, one for women and one for men. There is much advice available that addresses one sex or the other–at some point, I will go there for a couple weeks–but not this time. There are some basic truths I’m learning about intimate relationships that I’d like to share with you all.

For singles looking:

Try to get clear on what kind of relationship you want–for some of us, this is not as easy as it might seem. Write two columns, “Want,” and, “Don’t Want.” Tell the truth. Read them. Notice your visceral response to everything you’re reading. Is it accurate & current, or based on some past experience? You may need to update, or add a “Maybe,” column.

Once you’ve got some clarity, do something about it. Let go of all preconceived ideas about right or wrong ways to meet someone. If you have an issue with online dating, all that means is that you’re probably older than you’d like to admit. Get over it, already–it’s what almost everybody under 40 does, what everybody under 30 does, and a 20 year-old doesn’t even understand the question. However it used to be, where has it gotten you up to now?

Give yourself permission to flirt with everybody. I’m not suggesting you be salacious, or inappropriate in any way, just fully alive and willing to share your enjoyment of life with those around you.

Take this test–the next time you see someone attractive to you, what is your automatic response? Do you make eye contact and smile, or do you look away? If you’re looking away, stop that! Gaze into their eyes & smile–what could it hurt? If the person is psychologically healthy & open to love, they will receive your attention as a compliment.

Practice flirting with anyone in your category of interest. Build your ability to talk about your appreciation of life, and the small things you notice about someone that please you. Communicate this way when you’re out in the world. When you meet a potential lover whose charms stun you, you’ll be much less likely to run. You’ll be more likely to do what you do everyday.

For women (O.K., I can’t help it), this initially needs to lean towards sustained eye contact (five whole seconds, I mean it) and smiling. If the man appears terrified, thank God you’re getting the scoop up front. More likely, he’ll be intrigued and approach you.

For men, you need to gaze into a woman’s eyes, smile and speak. Yes, for our sake, for your sake, say something. A simple, “You look good today,” is a gift to any sane female (I know there are women with issues–just duck & move on).

Let yourself explore these ways of connecting. Regard it as a fun experiment, no pressure, just a juicy adventure. When we allow ourselves to be playful with each other, much anxiety falls away. Our willingness to enjoy life can be our most compelling quality.

I’ll stop here for now. Go out and flirt. I respectfully dare and encourage you.

Love and blessings,

Dr. Julianne

Aloha Dear Ones,

This has been a fascinating, challenging, deeply & unexpectedly transformative year. I’m very happy to let my friends know that I have begun writing again.

My plan is to post at least weekly. So much evolutionary love is coming forward, posts may need to be more frequent. We will see what Spirit wants.

I’m also available to new clients now, either in person (house/hotel calls) on Maui, or by phone/Skype globally.

I would love to hear from you. If you have a question you would like a spiritual shrink to answer, consider the column I proposed last year,    “Ask Dr. Julianne,” open for business. Please write your question in the comment section & I’ll answer as soon as I can.

If you would like to talk with me in a counseling session, please leave me a voicemail at 1-808-283-8431 and we can schedule a time. You might visit the, “Session Request,” page on my site and complete the questionnaire to get us started.

I’m so happy and grateful to be connecting with you all again–I look eagerly forward to many high & deep insights and inspirations in the sacred space between us.

Love and blessings, Julianne

Aloha from Maui, Hawaii!
When I needed emotional support and wanted a counselor, I looked for an experienced, credentialed professional who had a spiritual orientation to their work.  I was in Southern California at the time, and thought there would be many such individuals from which to choose.
The counselors I found fell largely into two groups–either traditionally trained therapists who viewed spiritual experience as a symptom, or alternative practitioners who lacked the training to guide anyone through a difficult psychological  passage. With the first group, the traditionalists, I could count on standardized treatment plans and professional ethics, but not an understanding of my spiritual needs.  The alternative group offered a variety of intriguing healing modalities that acknowledged my spiritual practice.  However, they had no clinical experience with psychological disorders and would not have recognized the need for a treatment different from their own.
I found a few licensed therapists who described themselves as spiritual–and who stated they were open to talking about their clients’ religious beliefs if the client brought it up.  None of them felt it was appropriate to actually counsel clients on the impact or practice of their beliefs.
Then there were the counselors affiliated with a particular religion or church.  These therapists would prescribe the group’s scriptures and offer clients their group’s interpretation of the beliefs required for peace
of mind.
All these individuals appeared well-intentioned.  Yet, I didn’t feel any of them were offering the depth of understanding I was seeking.
My insurance didn’t cover any of the more ‘spiritual’ licensed therapists–I decided to try the psychologist referred by my HMO.   Being a doctoral student in psychology, I told this attractive woman my diagnosis,  ‘Situational Disorder w/mixed emotional features.’  The lady was outraged and pointed out that I was the patient, she was the therapist and would determine what was wrong with me.  I did not return.
Happily, a couple of colleagues supported me through this challenging time.
When I was able to meditate on the entire adventure of finding the right therapist, I resolved to become the kind of counselor for whom I had been searching.
In my next post, I will explain the philosophy of  ‘Prayer Guided Psychotherapy,’ the basic components a client would encounter, and my own orientation to the work.